During he run up to LTD’s second birthday it felt like the little guy wanted to do something special at the party. He knew he would be the center of attention and wanted to have a little something up his sleeve to provide entertainment at the shindig. Well it turned out he wasn’t kidding about having something up his sleeve because he literally did. You see the little guy had invented his first joke. He slide his hand into his sleeve and begged us to answer the question, “where is it?” and since we didn’t know he was forced to pop his hand out and announce ‘here it is.” But as great as his joke was he always committed the biggest party foul around, he laughed at his own joke. So as much pride I took in the fact that he created his own joke it was always bitter sweet knowing that he showed bad form after the execution by laughing like a madman. Regardless of his behavior I still booked him on a summer tour of the Catskills, tickets and dates TBD.
If there is one thing I can’t abide it is making fun of the sick. However, LTD has different feelings regarding the ill. The other day I was coughing, the result of everyone in the house getting sick at different times, and LTD not only laughed at me, he faked coughed then laughed some more. Here I am an unpleasant feeling in my throat that forces me to hack and cough and what does my first-born do? How does he react in a family medical emergency? How does he show concern? He fakes it. The little guy hears a cough and takes that as a cue to fake cough and then laugh. I haven’t deciphered the full meaning of the glint in his eye during the fake cough laugh, but I hope that it does not forebode the beginnings of an evil genius practicing his evil laugh or slightly less evil fake cough.
The recent death of stage and screen legend June Havoc have got me thinking about LTD’s new career path. It seems he too would like to star as a Vaudeville baby. Sadly, I don’t have the heart to tell him that there is no more Vaudeville and his jokes aren’t really all that funny. Here is what he has come up with so far for his routine. When he is drinking his bottle he sometimes tries to stick it in my mouth, I humor him and pretend to drink and then he laughs hysterically, repeat. I mean this thing really makes him laugh. I think it would be hard for him to open for Sinbad at the Chuckle Hut in Parsippany, NJ because nobody really likes a prop comic and he laughs at his own jokes. Also, the more I think about his act, it is more of a ventriloquist thing making me the dummy.
The second joke in his act is even less exciting and it has only happened once. I was on the floor speaking on the phone while The Mommy was watching him. LTD came up to me and kept putting his ear on my mouth, making it so I couldn’t use the phone and laughing at The Mommy the whole time. While I like the fact that he is actually inventing jokes, I’m a little disappointed that he seems to becoming a hack. Now I get to spend my days fearing for the moment he gets his first joke book and asks me where a Vampire keeps his money. Duh, the blood bank. PS. I should have posted this entry on April Fools Day, but I’m so tired I forgot.