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What if

what ifLTD has developed a very specific set of questions that he asks frequently, I mean very frequently the questions are all different but they all begin the same. “What if…” It doesn’t stop ever. The topics range from the ridiculous to the theoretical possibilities. He focuses a lot of brain power on the morbid, what if that person was dead, what if their head fell off, what if they came back as a zombie? Truthfully, I have no problem with the creepy stuff, it is the mundane that I am losing patience with. What if the car won’t start? What if we didn’t pick up Mommy? I find myself answering and then going down a rabbit hole of scenarios and end with an exasperated, “then that would be our new life and we would deal with it.”Sadly, it has reached the point where my blood pressure rises when I hear any sentence that starts with the chilling phrase, what if?

Desire

i-want-it-all-and-i-want-it-nowSince BB and LTD share a room and said room is basically the only place in the house that has a gate to keep BB from destroying the house, the boys spend a fair amount of time there. However, unless LTD is on the top bunk, BB follows him around with a case of, “I want that.” Anything that LTD picks up instantly becomes an object of desire for BB to possess immediately. As you can imagine this behavior has never resulted in anything other than both children screaming. My default statement is always to tell LTD to just give it to him and he will get bored and forget about it. Thankfully, LTD is pretty good about appeasement and is beginning to learn to just take the book or toy downstairs when BB isn’t looking. It makes me proud that LTD has figured out BB’s pattern of theft, but frustrated that he sometimes falls into the yank it back trap. And truthfully, he is right to be concerned because BB has a near perfect record of destroying anything that can be destroyed. 

The Art of Seduction

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BB has developed a little habit that manifests itself only in very certain circumstances. He has learned to flirt, self taught of course. He only does it in very specific instances. He treats young women very differently then he does everyone else. He particularly likes to try new moves out on waitresses or nannies at the playground. He is not really shy but when in most situations he hides behind my leg, looks down or shakes his head when introduced to new people. However, if you are a young lady, look out he engages in a full on charm offensive. I’m talking about huge smile, walking away with a turn and a look. Today, he tried the casual pat on the knee to a young mom at the Aquarium. Let’s hope he can keep the cool factor up as he grows and not copy LTD’s style of announcing that he is wearing underwear and not a diaper followed by showing proof.

Up Up & Away

Tomorrow we fly with the boys for the first time. Wish us luck.

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Car Seat Safety

I missed yesterday’s Child Passenger Safety Twitter chat, but check out Parents Central. Especially in light of recent events concerning kids in cars.

Shut the Front Door

doorsAs long time Beyond the Car Seat readers know all too well, BB is freakishly strong. His bull like strength is displayed mainly on his new favorite task, shutting doors. Whenever we pass through an open door, BB stops and tries to shut it. This new hobby has two central challenges. The first is that I need to constantly make sure his wee fingers are not going to get crushed (as I did to LTD’s digits in the car door the other day) and the second problem occurs when I am trying to hold the door open for someone. When we leave school he turns and pushes the door closed telling gravity to go to hell, but if I’m holding it open for a fellow parent then a battle of wills erupts.Normally, he would win since he is so strong, but I cheat by picking him up, but in the end he can claim victory because when I pick him he screams in my face giving me a headache. At the end of the day, the good news is that I never have to worry about the heating bill since I’ll never have to tell him to shut the door he’s letting the heat out. 

Caped Crusader

adam-west-batmanAs long time Beyond the Car Seat readers know BB only speaks a few words. Sure, he babbles in complete sentences but no one but him knows what he is talking about. So in addition, to car and ball and the occasion daddy or mommy sprinkled with some animal noises (moo and woof) we now have a new random word to add to his lexicon. The Batman. It all started a few weeks ago when we went to a 75 anniversary event at the Barnes & Noble and then the comic store and now whenever he sees an image of the dark knight we are treated to “ba-ma” Trust me it is clearer than I wrote and it is obvious he is saying Batman. In conclusion, how do I feel that BB says Batman but doesn’t really ever say, daddy? I feel pretty great.

A Mydal Moment

bedSo in the crazy world of raising two boys things happen fast. This Saturday things happened really fast. We had previously removed bins from the boys room as BB was using them to get on to LTD’s bed. We didn’t really care that he was getting on the bed but it was concerning that he was going from the bed to the changing table/dresser. However, this Saturday we discovered that BB can get on to LTD’s bed without the aid of any bin or object. The Mommy and me thought we could just move the dresser away from the bed and this began a chain of events that in retrospect was predictable. We placed BB in his crib so we could move the furniture around and he quickly let us know that you can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube. Thankfully, we stopped him but he basically was prepared to re-enact The Great Escape as he put one leg over the crib wall. Throughout the day as The Mommy was researching options, he tried to summit the bookcases. To make a long story short, we made an emergency trip to Ikea and now the boys have bunk beds. 

If You Build It…He Will Take It Apart

hotwheelsBB consistently says the word, car and very little else. So for that reason we give him a lot of cars to play with and when he isn’t throwing them at my head he seems to be enjoying them. The other day I saw that they sell race track pieces separately. BB is still a little young to do anything with a track piece besides whip it back and forth and use it as yet another object to try and hit in the head with. The real reason the individual track pieces caught my eye is that it is very cool to be able to custom your racing experience to your environment and it is the kind of thing that is so simple, I can’t believe they didn’t have it when I was a kid. Of course, they probably did but the only thing I used my matchbox cars for when I was young was to re-create episodes of Chips. I don’t know if BB will still be into cars when he is old enough to build his own track but if he I will be excited to see what cool thing he designs and hopefully his race track will not involve anything hitting me in the head. 

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Story Corps

storycorps_logo_10_yearsI always enjoy listening to Story Corps and today I heard one about a pretty cool dad. Here.